A Gift of Hope: How We Survive Our Tragedies
by Robert L. Veninga

When dealing with the pain of loss -- a death, an unwanted divorce, financial loss -- or other personal crisis, this book is a gentle and caring guide to how to find hope.

When trying to find words to express my own feelings and to reach out to others also grieving, this book has been of immense help.

I'm glad to see that it's back in print -- it was briefly unavailable. It's the most valuable book I've found for people who've lost a loved one, or are otherwise struggling with personal tragedy.

A mark of its effectiveness is this: on 9/11, when I was searching for how to think about the tragedy, and caught up in my own emotions, I went for this book.

The definition of "crisis" which the authors promote fit the occasion precisely. Most Americans -- and others around the world -- experienced 9/11 as a deep and emotional crisis in hope. This book helped remind me of what it took to get back on track: beyond the original panic and grief, towards family, friends and community for support and to provide support, to reflection or meditation for individual strength-building, and so on.

These authors handle the "stages of grief" in a practical and inspiring way, one that doesn't seem to require that we must move through the stages quickly and in neat order, but that recognizes that healing comes in waves, and grief will surprise us by returning, often just when we think we're over it.

I recommend a copy or two on everyone's shelf -- one for yourself, when you need it, or when you need to be reminded of some helpful words for a friend -- and another to be able to just give it, without strings, to someone in crisis or grief, so that they can use it to help find new hope.

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